auntiesnixshipper:

awkwardteenagenerves:

discard-and-discover:

evolve-within:

disregardwomen:

When my mom’s out in public, she sends me pictures of lesbians she sees.

Jesus I envy that relationship. 

this is like the time when my mum took me bra shopping and the girl measuring me up was a lesbian and my mum said to me “i’ll go take a walk around the shop so you can talk to this nice young girl” and gave me a look as if to say “chat her up”. 

My mum tries to push me towards cute possibly gay girls and then disappears. She did it in Primark once and I found her hiding behind a pile of knickers, watching me.

i love all of your moms

When I was 17 I was convinced I was in love with the check out girl at the grocery store 5 minutes away from our house, so my dad went to get milk and somehow found an appropriate point in the conversation while buying a half gallon of milk to give her my number. Three days later she called me and asked if I wanted to come over “to watch a movie” and long story short my dad got me laid thanks dad.

  1. butterfly-guarded-hime reblogged this from shadowedlove97
  2. dawsonrobert reblogged this from leftnipple
  3. r3d-riding-hood reblogged this from mikarons
  4. mysterious-hell reblogged this from acousticjunqle
  5. rainbowsamaundercover reblogged this from imthequeenoftherodeo
  6. 0pen-y0ur--eyes reblogged this from acousticjunqle
  7. x-smilewhenithurtsmost reblogged this from acousticjunqle
  8. acousticjunqle reblogged this from that-lesbian-kid
  9. imthequeenoftherodeo reblogged this from time-traveling-impala
  10. the-fangirling-loser reblogged this from the-owner-of-the-minons
  11. the-wind-and-sky reblogged this from missrobbins98
  12. stoic-ambivalence reblogged this from missrobbins98
  13. madz2508 reblogged this from hhippiehipsterr and added:
    What would we do without tumblr Amazing story btw!!
  14. lilyfreee reblogged this from falloutsykes
  15. chocolatetori reblogged this from mypatronusiscat
  16. moondoorssqueen reblogged this from its-onlyjustme
  17. falloutsykes reblogged this from farzap
  18. its-onlyjustme reblogged this from feminisrn
  19. bonnietheelf reblogged this from gucciestpotato
  20. litmusfox reblogged this from creamyhorse
  21. creamyhorse reblogged this from gucciestpotato
  22. gucciestpotato reblogged this from missrobbins98
  23. missrobbins98 reblogged this from husker7899
  24. lalalillybee reblogged this from lady-fucking-lucifer
  25. thatkidnamedawkward reblogged this from lovealways-jenn
  26. mnknah reblogged this from schrodingerstriceratops
  27. lovealways-jenn reblogged this from farzap
  28. schrodingerstriceratops reblogged this from anothersherlockian
  29. a-swedish-girl reblogged this from johnlockistheairibreathe
HOOLIGNX